Swimming Sideways

 

I got caught in an undertow in the 7th Grade. Our school took the 7th-12th graders on a fun outing to one of the most beautiful beaches of my childhood.

My best friend couldn't go, so I ventured out into the water alone. The water was so refreshing. I floated, looked up at the beautiful clouds and daydreamed about everything!

When it came time to swim back to shore, something caught my foot. I now understand why we need swimming buddies. I had never heard of an undertow. It was strong, pulling me out to sea fast. I paddled as hard as I could, flailing sometimes, but wasn't giving up. 

I then noticed something: The surface water was going into shore, and if I could stay on top and swim in, I knew I'd make it. 

But it wasn't so simple as the undertow was about two feet below me, so dipping just slightly into that current whisked me back out to sea.

I yelled for help, but the people behind me and the people on the beach didn't respond. All I wanted was to be on dry land with my friends, having a good time. 

Meanwhile, I rested from time to time by floating and enjoying the Windows 95 day.

The real ordeal lasted about 30 minutes, but it felt longer. Once I got to shore, it took what felt like another 30 minutes to find my group. Being nearsighted didn't help either. I know I was a sight to strangers peeking under umbrellas.

I don't think I was ever so happy as the moment I found my friends! I recall flopping down on the sand, exhausted. I believe I fell asleep for a long time as I looked like a boiled lobster that night. It took me a couple of days to heal and I missed school the following Monday.

But then I was as good as new! I thanked God for literally slowing my mind down enough to run a viable solution passed my panic.

You'd think I'd hate the beach, but it is one of my favorite places. I can't wait to get there, set up the umbrella and wade out into the water!

Maybe you are in a circumstantial undertow. Maybe it's been so long that you wonder if you ever were on dry land. You yell for help. No one comes. You try to describe what's going on. It seems unreal. No response. People do care, but may not understand what's going on. It's okay. 

As Dori in Finding Nemo says, "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."

But yes, you were on dry land once. You basked in the sunshine and felt the wind on your face, and you will again. Get the rest you need. You've gone through something big, but it didn't get you down. 

Now you're ready to tell your story. If you try to tell it in the middle of the panic, it will come out wrong, backwards, upsidedown. But once you've rested, you will realize by God's loving grace you got through it and are stronger, kinder, more patient and a better listener. And now you can help others with the lessons you learned. In fact, you may find some humor in parts of your story given time.

I can still see the people jumping when I looked under the umbrellas. I jumped myself. In fact, I am so glad I happened to pick the right direction when I headed up the beach. Imagine if I had chosen the other direction? They might still be looking for me!

Someone told me later in life what to do if caught in an undertow:

Swim sideways.

It can be a handy life philosophy as well.

Swimming sideways can be whatever it takes to get you out of any life loop; it's healing, it's rescue, it's life-saving. If you try to swim into shore, you will exhaust yourself.

Just swim sideways...not forwards, not backwards, sideways as fast as you can and you'll be away from the current quicker than you can say "something's got my foot and I can't get out"!

But you can get out.

In these unprecedented times, I echo the words being said globally, We'll get through this. I don't say this idealistically, nor disrespectfully, but I truly believe we will.

We will hug again, kiss on the cheeks, high five, chest bump, feel the love, have dreams and build a better tomorrow.

In closing, I thank God for our emergency and medical workers, our leaders, entertainers who keep us laughing, and family and friends who comfort and keep us connected! What are you thankful for?

Tribute to an Original: Eddie Van Halen

My college roommate Sharon introduced me to Van Halen somewhere around 1983. I bought the albums Diver Down and 1984. The songs I played over and over were Dancin' in the Streets and Pretty Woman from DD, and Jump from 1984.

I didn't know a lot about their personal lives except that Valerie Bertinelli married Eddie in 1981 and they had a son named Wolfgang, named after Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. They nicknamed him Wolfie.

In the years since I learned that Eddie and Alex were classically trained pianists. 

Learning about Eddie's death a couple of days ago brought back a lot of memories from college and dating John. Van Halen and U2 were our in-common bands. After David Lee Roth left the band, we still followed VH through the Sammy Hagar years and part of the Gary Cherone years (the lead singer from Extreme who took Sammy Hagar's place. My two favorite Extreme songs I wore out were Hole Hearted and More than Words; didn't care for the album's name in case some may wonder, but I digress).

In the last couple of days I learned that Gene Simmons discovered Van Halen around 1976. I watched a short clip on ET on Gene Simmons' words about Eddie. He mentioned last seeing him shortly after Eddie's diagnosis. Eddie had his famous grin on and off the stage. Gene got the courage up to ask about his diagnosis, and Eddie kept it light, then bid goodbye. Gene commented on his constant kindness.

I also learned their father was Dutch and mother Indonesian. They came from Holland when the boys were young. The Van Halen's settled in California, the parents working a lot to keep the boys in school and in piano lessons. Eddie ended up purchasing a drum kit and somehow a guitar got thrown in, either by his parents, or Alex bought it. The short story is they traded instruments and the rest is history. Eddie's words about Alex were something like Alex made music on the drums.

There is so much I don't know, but will end with this; Eddie did the guitar solo for Michael Jackson's Beat It. He made a deal with the producer, Quincy Jones to do the rif. When the "Beat It" musicians were away from the studio, Eddie snuck in and played  around with a few rifs. He layed down a track which Quincy said was better than the one they had written originally. Eddie didn't want pay or credit as VH had a pact that none of them would do solo or side work. Eddie "got away" with it because everyone was on vacation and he had the time to do a favor for his friend Quincy.

In the little information I've gathered these last few days I discovered that though Eddie was a chain smoker and battled alcohol much of his life, he was still known for his good nature. In his later years, he was valued and remained humble. In a short interview clip he was telling his story to some college students and asked them about fifteen minutes into telling his story, "Is this interesting"? They all yelled, "Yes"!

Thank you Eddie for finding new ways to bring music out of an electric guitar and lifting so many spirits. Rest in Peace and know your family is in the world's prayers and hearts now.