Swimming Sideways

 

I got caught in an undertow in the 7th Grade. Our school took the 7th-12th graders on a fun outing to one of the most beautiful beaches of my childhood.

My best friend couldn't go, so I ventured out into the water alone. The water was so refreshing. I floated, looked up at the beautiful clouds and daydreamed about everything!

When it came time to swim back to shore, something caught my foot. I now understand why we need swimming buddies. I had never heard of an undertow. It was strong, pulling me out to sea fast. I paddled as hard as I could, flailing sometimes, but wasn't giving up. 

I then noticed something: The surface water was going into shore, and if I could stay on top and swim in, I knew I'd make it. 

But it wasn't so simple as the undertow was about two feet below me, so dipping just slightly into that current whisked me back out to sea.

I yelled for help, but the people behind me and the people on the beach didn't respond. All I wanted was to be on dry land with my friends, having a good time. 

Meanwhile, I rested from time to time by floating and enjoying the Windows 95 day.

The real ordeal lasted about 30 minutes, but it felt longer. Once I got to shore, it took what felt like another 30 minutes to find my group. Being nearsighted didn't help either. I know I was a sight to strangers peeking under umbrellas.

I don't think I was ever so happy as the moment I found my friends! I recall flopping down on the sand, exhausted. I believe I fell asleep for a long time as I looked like a boiled lobster that night. It took me a couple of days to heal and I missed school the following Monday.

But then I was as good as new! I thanked God for literally slowing my mind down enough to run a viable solution passed my panic.

You'd think I'd hate the beach, but it is one of my favorite places. I can't wait to get there, set up the umbrella and wade out into the water!

Maybe you are in a circumstantial undertow. Maybe it's been so long that you wonder if you ever were on dry land. You yell for help. No one comes. You try to describe what's going on. It seems unreal. No response. People do care, but may not understand what's going on. It's okay. 

As Dori in Finding Nemo says, "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."

But yes, you were on dry land once. You basked in the sunshine and felt the wind on your face, and you will again. Get the rest you need. You've gone through something big, but it didn't get you down. 

Now you're ready to tell your story. If you try to tell it in the middle of the panic, it will come out wrong, backwards, upsidedown. But once you've rested, you will realize by God's loving grace you got through it and are stronger, kinder, more patient and a better listener. And now you can help others with the lessons you learned. In fact, you may find some humor in parts of your story given time.

I can still see the people jumping when I looked under the umbrellas. I jumped myself. In fact, I am so glad I happened to pick the right direction when I headed up the beach. Imagine if I had chosen the other direction? They might still be looking for me!

Someone told me later in life what to do if caught in an undertow:

Swim sideways.

It can be a handy life philosophy as well.

Swimming sideways can be whatever it takes to get you out of any life loop; it's healing, it's rescue, it's life-saving. If you try to swim into shore, you will exhaust yourself.

Just swim sideways...not forwards, not backwards, sideways as fast as you can and you'll be away from the current quicker than you can say "something's got my foot and I can't get out"!

But you can get out.

In these unprecedented times, I echo the words being said globally, We'll get through this. I don't say this idealistically, nor disrespectfully, but I truly believe we will.

We will hug again, kiss on the cheeks, high five, chest bump, feel the love, have dreams and build a better tomorrow.

In closing, I thank God for our emergency and medical workers, our leaders, entertainers who keep us laughing, and family and friends who comfort and keep us connected! What are you thankful for?

Improving with Age

I got curious today about a family club we used to frequent in Brazil.

It was called the Clube de Campo Do Castelo, or the Country Club of the Castle.



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=er-a0JkRf0c

The club looks like it's still going strong, changing very little of the landscape, tennis courts, pool, gymnasium, restaurant and meeting areas. I see a new gym and the boats on the lake are up to date.

It was so much fun to go out there on Thursday afternoons. Our mothers shared carpooling, and would come out to get us after school in a big group to take us to the clube. Some of us would play tennis with our fathers, who had been out there most of the day already.

Some of the mothers played tennis as well. The other mothers in our mission group hung out under the canopy of trees. There was always conversation, some women crafted and others relaxed!

We kids could rent hammocks, ride paddle boats, play on the play sets, run around the large acreage playing all kinds of games, swim, play clay court tennis, or play on the tennis backboard to get some practice.

The clube was a place of respite, where we could catch our breath and look forward to the weekend.

I recall my Uncle Allen and Aunt Lucia joining us. They were always in the pool with us kids, and Allen taught me how to do the side crawl, on both sides! We loved throwing coins into the pool and racing to grab them! We would race as well, among so many other aquatic games; many of which were made up.

There was also a walkway over the pool, dividing the shallow end of the pool from the deep end. There was something magical about that bridge. It could be anything we wanted it to be, from a bridge over a mote, to water washing under a cave.

During American Holidays, we'd have cookouts on the grills and our mothers would spread a feast on the picnic tables! We'd sing the US National Anthem, America the Beautiful, and other folk songs. If it was World Cup season, we might throw in a song to celebrate our beloved Brazil!

I am imagining all the fun the country club is still having with a newer generation of families! May you be around a long time dear clube!

Happy Birthday America, Your Pot Continues to Melt Over!

"The ground of liberty is to be gained by inches, that we must be contented to secure what we can get from time to time, and eternally press forward for what is yet to get."

-Thomas Jefferson to Charles Clay Monticello Jan. 27. 1790.
Web Source: http://tjrs.monticello.org/letter/123

Like Yakov Smirnoff used to say, "America, what a country"! It is an amazing country, for in it's ideal state, opposing opinions should enrich one another. Left and Right can meet with a kiss of peace, educating and bringing the extreme views into a more balanced state.


Two thanksgivings come to mind on this day.

The first is that I am blessed with friends in so many sectors and philosophies of Americana, and am the richer for it. There is something beautiful in everyone. Celebrating the good is the only way to give birth to more good.

Secondly, I have been fortunate enough to celebrate the 4th of July in many places, including overseas.

Growing up in Brazil, my parents and other Americans living abroad remembered our roots together. We celebrated with our friends, who were our overseas family, with the traditional cookout of hot dogs, hamburgers, potato salad, apple pie, and usually brigadeiros were thrown in. They're known as chocolate Brazilian truffles, and in my opinion, the national dessert!

We sang the traditional songs, the American National Anthem, America The Beautiful, My Country 'Tis of Thee, and then might throw some camp songs in, both in English and Portuguese.

I recall also celebrating in Japan while there during one summer in college. One of my college mates Melanie and I spent the fourth with an American family, the Rays. We had a cookout, of course. I looked out the window and spied a large car below, that though parallel parked, seemed to take up one lane of the road. At this point, I had been in Japan so long I was used to the diminutive size of everything. When we left, we walked by the car and realized it was a Trans Am! Straight from America to Japan!

And finally, in honor of the World Cup...24 years ago we married in the Boston area, and honeymooned in Florida. That was the year the World Cup was being held in America! Both of us being soccer fans - you could say soccer even brought us together - we so wanted to see one of the games. But the closest we got were the stadiums in Boston and Orlando, but no dice! TV was our salvation! We spent the 4th with some friends, Boston "ex-pats," and watched...wait for it...USA V. Brazil! Brazil won 1-0.

This country is a gift not only to its citizens, but to the world. When we are humble, thank God and put our minds and hearts to work, the world becomes a better place. I believe in American diplomacy, not only via diplomats, but the everyday citizen. My parents taught me diplomacy, and it has come in handy when entering new cultures and sub-cultures. Today I am learning to live in the 21st century culture, and its a new breed of nearly everything. But I am hopeful. I love the next generation, particularly since our daughter is a part of this culture of force for good.

I believe that the USA will not decline, as other great nations have, after 200-250 years. Based upon our roots, I see it flourishing as a great tree shading not only its citizens, but those of other countries through polite diplomacy, citizen cooperation and a constant curiosity for learning and passing along the important to the next generation. We may be in a slump, but not for long! We are resilient, loving, strong and kind. I see new generations being more grateful for their ancestors; we all stand on the shoulders of giants!

So America, Happy Birthday, and may these beautiful colors never flag, may they stand strong with the deepest love for country and all humanity, and may we all know how loved and blessed we are each day God gives us life!

1812 Overture FlashMob! 

Written by a Russian, Tchaikovsky, and played at the Placa del Mercat, Algemeci, Valencia, Spain!
And claimed by Americans as one of our Patriotic pieces of music!

Enjoy!

This post is dedicated to all of those who have served in our armed forces, missionaries, public servants, entrepreneurs, employees, artists, entertainers, believers, non-believers, families, the childless, singles, the dreamers, successful, non-successful, the in-progress, the "don't-give'uppers," liberals, conservatives, hippies, baby boomers, gen-Xers, gen-futures, professors, students, the marginalized; all who call themselves Americans, and those who have given the ultimate gift of their lives. To those who have been wounded or are going through difficulty and are hurting, may your healing come quickly, for we honor your life as well.

God bless you and God bless America!

Innumerable Chances

I am enjoying a new day.

In fact, I have had so many fresh starts and second chances it isn't fair to those who only have a few.

So I do my best to use my second, third and more chances to the best of my abilities.

But then the inevitable happens and I find myself needing another chance in a situation that somehow does not seem to find resolution in this particular age, economy and connectedness.

I find it ironic that today with the wealth of beauty, opportunity and connectivity that more people seem to be suffering from chronic sadness, poverty and loneliness. If you are suffering so, my prayer for you is that this is only a dark season incubating a wonderful blessing just around the corner.

I believe as long as we have a sound mind and open heart, God can do amazing miracles in the deep recesses of our souls if we let Him.

Each day is a new canvas upon which to paint more of God's beautiful story in my life.

What will I do with my innumerable chances today? How can I use my mind to store and process the truth I see going on around me? How will I manage my emotions among a bevy of reasons to get down? How can I use my material blessings to bless another spiritually?

Can a new car substitute for a phone call to a loved one?

Can a new dress substitute for sitting across a good friend having coffee?

Can the focus on an ambition absolve me from acting kindly towards the needy that surround me almost every day?

A phone call, a cup of coffee, and hand-me-up...the immeasurable joy that can come from each of these cannot be understated!

Here's to your phone call today, a cup of coffee with a friend - possibly over the phone - and an opportunity to bless someone along the side of the road of life with encouraging smiles, words or material blessings that their day might end on a more hopeful note!

Who knows, the weightiness you - we all feel at times will slowly lift...and who couldn't call that miraculous?

A reason to be down has been turned upside down by focusing on the Father of Lights and all the Light He has shone upon us this beautiful new day by reaching out in faith, not judging who will receive my love.

Thanks for stopping by Coffee At My Table!

A Man in Whom There Is No Guile

"Honey, what are you wearing tonight?"

I rounded the corner, dressed in a black turtleneck, fall print skirt, brown boots and a yellow shawl amidst the late winter chilly weather that had just blown in.

John took one look and said, "Okay, that means a t-shirt and jeans for me," in typical McEwen humor.

Tonight was John's first real exposure to my alma mater. They played a college here in San Antonio this past Saturday night. We missed the game as we were driving in from Houston, not knowing all of this was going on. But on Sunday we got word that there was going to be a gathering on Tuesday (tonight) for alumni and potential students.

Little did we know when we showed up that it was going to be a full OC entourage, complete with the President of the college as well. There were faithful who hailed from the days when I attended college. I believe there were at least four or five more representatives, including the Dean of Students. I have been out of touch with my alma mater, but after tonight, I am very happy to be reconnected. My aim going forward is to be more kind to this school that was kind to me. I remember so many professors who influenced my studies and thinking and am forever grateful.

It was a relaxing evening where we got to speak one on one with the reps, and hear a bit about the good that the college is doing these days, namely keeping costs affordable for students. The hosts were a delight as usual. Their family has been instrumental in connecting San Antonio with the college and sending many students its way.

John didn't go to a Christian college, and though his and my values are the same, our experiences have been very different. It does my heart good when I get to share a positive experience from my past and John understands and appreciates it, especially since I grew up in another country and my family came from a different part than his family did in these United States.

John is a Yankee, born and bred on the streets just outside of Boston, Massachusetts, cuttin his teeth on the culture that founded this country, some eight generations removed. They are a rowdy lot for sure with stomachs tough enough to weather swimming in the ocean and eating ice cream during the winter! But John is a man of integrity as well, a good work ethic and a nature that can laugh at anything, so much so that we've caught ourselves straightening up our act after realizing we might not be acting our age upon getting tickled, even in church.

He is a man full of the joy of life, and a man acquainted with some real sorrow. Yet, he is upbeat to be around, he steps up when asked, puts his best effort forward and knows how to relax. He is a man of great faith and humility. Jesus said of his disciple Nathaniel, "Behold an Israelite indeed, in whom there is no guile." I think of John when I read those words. John is the first to admit he has many faults, but as his wife of eighteen and a half years, I can say he is one of those persons with no guile.

What a joy then to see him milling around with former collegues and faculty, as comfortable as if he had graduated from there and "making my joy complete," if I can borrow a phrase from the apostle Paul. John has earned a well-deserved reputation among the college since he works a couple of times a year with groups coming from the college. I thought it was cute that someone at the party claimed John was "the man" when it came to building houses.

Again, I am amazed that I got to be on the sidelines watching a wonderful episode of life unfold before my eyes. On the way home, John and I spoke about how thankful we are for the opportunities we've been given, though we like to be quiet and understated. I hope this note does not come across as self-congratulation, but for what it is, gratitude for my college experience and for a husband who has been so good to me.

John, this post is dedicated to you as you serve the community. I pray that you know how valuable you are to me as well.

I love you! Denise

Thank You For Being A Friend

This is a short and sweet piece.

Every time I read the book Job I wonder, "What if his friends said, 'Job, we don't understand why you are going through what you're going through, but we will be here with you. What can we pray for and what can we do for you?'"

I don't presume to know the end of the story had it started out this way, but I know that a response like this one is a wonderful prescription for someone in any kind of pain, whether the pain comes by one's own hand or whether it was unwarranted. I don't have control over the outcome, but do have control in my choices -- will it be a servant's heart, or a judge's heart?

The servant's heart always pleases the Lord. No one knows one's trials more than the one under trial, so a reminder of what may have or actually did cause one's pain only adds more pain.

But some say, "Don't we have to speak up when wrong is done?" Yes, to the one who has injured an innocent party, not to the party injured -- even those who injure themselves are in need of mercy, particularly if they have in the past given mercy to others. They simply need a reminder that they have not been forgotten in their suffering. Christ-like servanthood teaches us mercy, not judmentalism.

I don't know that I've ever really experienced the pain a Job's friend would inflict. I've been blessed to have friends in the Lord who pray with me and build me up in times of trial. There have even been times when God has sent non-believers into my life, but who speak God's wisdom [per the Scriptures I continue studying] unknown to themselves and help me through a trial. In these cases, I cannot reject the non-believer's wisdom, but I consider it in light of Scripture. I also thank God for sending that person into my life at the time with the words I needed. God always wins!

This post is dedicated to all of my family and friends whom God has given me to watch over me, pray for me, speak truth in love and pray with me. I especially dedicate this post to Lisa and Priscilla. You all are gems in my life! May I in turn bless you with the manner in which I go through any trial.